Madame Web (2024) Review

RATING: 2/10

EVERY once in a while, an unforgettable piece of cinema comes along that captures the minds of audiences. Whether or not the film ends up being good is ultimately irrelevant; what truly matters is its ability to make you smile and laugh. It's just a shame Madame Web achieved all these feats in an ironic manner.

New York paramedic Cassandra Webb (Dakota Johnson) begins to show signs of clairvoyance, otherwise known as "the sixth sense", after a medical emergency leaves her critically-injured. Her new psychedelic powers forces her to face revelations from her past, leading her in the path of teenagers Julia (Sydney Sweeney), Anya (Isabela Merced) and Mattie (Celeste O'Connor) as she must now protect the trio from an unknown threat looking to destroy them.

There are countless reasons as to why Madame Web was a critical and financial bomb. Releasing a superhero movie, let alone one not centred around romance, is never a good way to bring couples to the cinema, plus it doesn't help that the film received terrible press due to the justified critiques made against it. Much like Sony's previous failure, Morbius, this shameless connection to an already-floundering Marvel universe attempts to justify its existence through name recognition alone without putting in any of the effort to make it warranted. And unlike 2022's Morbius, which while a colossal failure, kept alive through ironic humour and "memeable" moments. Madame Web tries to replicate organic internet humour through terrible marketing, resulting in cringe-worthy dialogue that couldn't be further from being organic.

Despite all the leading ladies being competent actresses, each of them deliver dull, uninspired performances. Director S.J Clarkson does them no favours, failing to properly explain their motivation behind certain scenes, causing moments of genuine humour or devastation to be lost in translation. An example of this comes when Johnson's character is explaining the situation to the trio for the first time, but their reaction to it comes off as comedic when the tone and script give off a melancholic tone. Given all these ladies have delivered good performances in the past, this places fault at the feet of the director.

The best Sony could have hoped for with Madame Web is another Morbius situation, but it's safe to say that not even the internet will warm up to the idea of ironically-loving this abomination. Poor directing, a cringe-worthy script and cheesy acting all come together to create a bad superhero movie that feels like it was ripped right out of the mid-2000's; an apt description considering this is set in 2003. All that can be said about Madame Web is that it won't be "Madame Webbing time" anytime soon.